Thursday, October 11, 2012

Today is National Coming Out Day

Unwittingly, eleven years ago almost to the day I came out to my former wife.  It was the first step on what would prove to be a long turbulent journey.  Admittedly, I was clueless at the time on many gay rights issues that I write about all the time now.  All I knew was that I could not go on living my life like some actor on a stage playing a role that wasn't the real me.   The stress of always maintaining a glass wall between myself and the world was becoming simply too much to handle.  Add to that the emotional and psychological damage done to me being raised Catholic and my foolishly believing the "pray away the gay" myth, and suicide really looked to be the only alternative to finally trying to face who I really was.  Since taking that first initial step, the intervening years have certainly seen triumphs and tragedies.  But I have accomplished one thing: a level of self-acceptance and peace with who I am that had eluded me for nearly five decades.

I know from the e-mails I receive or even from venturing into gay chat rooms, that there are still so many individuals who are not "out" and still living their lives in various levels of fear of discovery.   It is a scary place to be.  I've been there.  But coming out is not only liberating, it is also the strongest form of activism that one can undertake.  Living out and proud is a daily testament that the lies and smears told about LGBT individuals are not true.  Being out is truly the most powerful way to alter hearts and minds.   It's not always easy and, yes, it can be terrifying at times.   But it beats the hell out of staying in the closet.

 

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